Savage Amusement
The Autobiography of a Semi-Unknown, Semi-Genius,
The Life of a Poet in San Francisco, in 1975.
Longing for One in the Other
When I told you I was embarrassed
To know you so well as to become you,
I was confessing a terrible emptiness.
When I look down and see my cloudy
Transparency, I become afraid.
My yearning to be full doesn’t diminish you,
But makes you unbearably desirable.
I don’t see through you, like I said I did,
I can’t become you, I can’t fill myself with you.
If I alone ghost the space between us,
I will succeed only in vacating myself.
Sometimes, I’m lost outside my bones,
And I look so hard for them, I think I see
Other people’s bones beneath their flesh.
When I feel their bones and their flesh,
Temporarily, I quit looking for my own.
I find myself in being alone.
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